EXIT FAMILY SUPPORT UNDERSTANDS WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH
Because we have had a loved one involved and helped them leave
We Provide No Judgement - Just Support
If you have a loved one involved in extremism and don't know what to do, don't worry you are not alone.
Providing non-judgmental support, we want to help you keep them safe and away from danger.
Offering confidential advice from people who understand, we don't judge, because we are family members who have had a loved one involved ourselves and former members of the far-right who have turned our lives around and left.
Working together we are here for you and want to support you to understand why someone can become involved in extremism and how to have conversations that don't end up in arguments, so you can help the person you love, see alternatives to extremism and how family is everything.
Providing non-judgmental support, we want to help you keep them safe and away from danger.
Offering confidential advice from people who understand, we don't judge, because we are family members who have had a loved one involved ourselves and former members of the far-right who have turned our lives around and left.
Working together we are here for you and want to support you to understand why someone can become involved in extremism and how to have conversations that don't end up in arguments, so you can help the person you love, see alternatives to extremism and how family is everything.
ABOUT US
Exit Family Support is here to help people who think their loved one might be involved with an extremist group.
We are family members who have had a loved one involved ourselves and former far-right activists who’ve rejected our past and now use our experiences to help others.
We know what you’re going through and we can help. Alongside our family members and formers who have a lived experience of the impact of experience, we also have a growing number of professionals who engage with people involved, so we all understand and never judge.
Because most of us have been through what you are experiencing, we know how lonely and worried you can feel and that's why Exit Family Support exists and we have been supporting families since 2017.
Not the police, there is no risk in contacting us. Everything you say is in confidence and just between us.
We provide support, advice and reassurance tailored to your family’s needs, so your loved one can get back to a normal life.
We’ll work with you to find solutions, explain things along the way and be with you every step of the way if you want.
Part of Exit Hate UK a registered charity (1197666) , we are here for you.
Need help?
Please Complete This Support Request Form . Just click on the highlighted text and submit.
Email - info@exithate.org
Phone - 0800 999 1945
We are family members who have had a loved one involved ourselves and former far-right activists who’ve rejected our past and now use our experiences to help others.
We know what you’re going through and we can help. Alongside our family members and formers who have a lived experience of the impact of experience, we also have a growing number of professionals who engage with people involved, so we all understand and never judge.
Because most of us have been through what you are experiencing, we know how lonely and worried you can feel and that's why Exit Family Support exists and we have been supporting families since 2017.
Not the police, there is no risk in contacting us. Everything you say is in confidence and just between us.
We provide support, advice and reassurance tailored to your family’s needs, so your loved one can get back to a normal life.
We’ll work with you to find solutions, explain things along the way and be with you every step of the way if you want.
Part of Exit Hate UK a registered charity (1197666) , we are here for you.
Need help?
Please Complete This Support Request Form . Just click on the highlighted text and submit.
Email - info@exithate.org
Phone - 0800 999 1945
KNOW THE SIGNS
It can be worrying when you notice your loved one’s behaviour changing. It can be a difficult time and many parents want to know how to tell if their loved one has become involved with far-right extremism. The truth is there’s no easy answer.
Lots of teenagers push the boundaries as a normal part of growing up, but it doesn’t mean they are being radicalised. The key is to look at the whole picture to see if there’s any real cause for concern.
To help here are some signs people involved with the extreme right-wing may show:
ATTITUDE
Change in mood. They may be more argumentative or aggressive.
Have a sudden increase in intolerance of other people’s views.
Give ‘scripted’ answers if you question their views.
Feel they are victim of injustice or blame others for their problems.
Change in mood. They may be more argumentative or aggressive.
Have a sudden increase in intolerance of other people’s views.
Give ‘scripted’ answers if you question their views.
Feel they are victim of injustice or blame others for their problems.
BEHAVIOUR
Secretive behaviour – Seeking to hide what they are doing, things to look out for might be for example hiding what they are looking at online, either on their phone or their laptop.
Changes in routine, travel, friends or interests. Connecting with people, no-one knows,
Idolising historical extremists for example i.e., Adolf Hitler, Oswald Mosley or both.
Supporting populist figures of today, i.e., Andrew Tate.
Secretive behaviour – Seeking to hide what they are doing, things to look out for might be for example hiding what they are looking at online, either on their phone or their laptop.
Changes in routine, travel, friends or interests. Connecting with people, no-one knows,
Idolising historical extremists for example i.e., Adolf Hitler, Oswald Mosley or both.
Supporting populist figures of today, i.e., Andrew Tate.
APPEARANCE
Change in appearance – This could include people wearing different types of clothes or having new tattoos with symbols that you have never seen before.
Their clothing may become plainer to hide their views , so they don't stick out or it could change where people start to have logos on what they wear and you have never seen them before. This could be a sign they are supportive of an extremist group.
people could start collecting far-right extremist literature and have it in their bedroom or home, including books like Mein Kampf, Siege and The Turner Diaries. They could also have items like flags, leaflets or posters on display. They maybe trying to show their identity, or hide it, this all depends on the group people support.
Here our advice is if you are worried, talk to someone. You can contact Exit Family Support at: info@exithate.org and we will be in touch as soon as we can.
Change in appearance – This could include people wearing different types of clothes or having new tattoos with symbols that you have never seen before.
Their clothing may become plainer to hide their views , so they don't stick out or it could change where people start to have logos on what they wear and you have never seen them before. This could be a sign they are supportive of an extremist group.
people could start collecting far-right extremist literature and have it in their bedroom or home, including books like Mein Kampf, Siege and The Turner Diaries. They could also have items like flags, leaflets or posters on display. They maybe trying to show their identity, or hide it, this all depends on the group people support.
Here our advice is if you are worried, talk to someone. You can contact Exit Family Support at: info@exithate.org and we will be in touch as soon as we can.
KNOW THE DANGERS
Without support, your loved one could be manipulated into an act that puts their lives or the lives of others at risk.
Far-right or extreme right-wing groups are powerful and very manipulative.
Young people can be vulnerable to their messages as they struggle to find their identity.
If your loved one has been drawn in by extremists, the fact is that they are at risk.
The extreme right wing includes radical and violent nationalist and supremacist groups. They can have links to Satanist and neo-Nazi cults who see people as nothing more than pawns to promote their hate and its critical we keep as many people away from this lifestyle as possible, because nothing positive will come of it.
Some of these groups are even banned by the UK government, which means that even being a member is a crime and could result in a lengthy prison sentence and therefore getting people out is the best thing we can do for them and yourself , to protect them and others from harm.
Their involvement could land them in prison, threatening their safety and limiting their prospect of living a normal life in the future, including getting a job. Your concern could help them and they will thank you for it later.
Extremist groups brainwash people and can push them to perform acts of violence, even though people may not want to, because they are scared.
Your loved one's exposure to these ideas and acts risks grave physical and psychological harm to people involved and this we call involvement trauma which people can suffer from for many years and this is why we are here to help families like you get your loved ones away from extremist influence and help them rebuild their lives away from danger.
HOW TO HAVE DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS
If you think a loved one has been groomed by an extreme far-right group, stay calm and keep talking to them. The risk your loved one runs by being involved with extremists means you will want to help them to understand what could happen, and encourage them to leave.
Sadly, there’s no magic wand you can wave to make them change their mind, but non-judgmental conversations can make a huge difference.
Don’t expect it to be easy – people involved in the far-right can be defensive and angry if they feel their beliefs are being threatened.
The good news is you don’t have to do this alone.
The advice below is the collective wisdom of many other parents who have helped their loved ones get out of extremism and go on to lead normal lives.
HOW TO HAVE CONVERSATIONS WITHOUT ENDING UP IN AN ARGUMENT
The main thing is to avoid arguing and telling them they’re wrong – it could push your loved one further away.
- Try not to use words like ‘extremist’, ‘racist’, 'nazi', ‘groomed’ or ‘radicalised’, which could make them feel attacked.
- Talk in a relaxed atmosphere for example at home over a cup of tea.
- Pick a time that’s good for both of you, try to avoid interruptions and turn off your phone.
- Tell your loved one you genuinely want to hear what they think – not just what the media says. Explain you know there are things wrong in society and want to know how they think they can make things better. This will open the door to difficult, but honest conversations.
WHAT TO EXPECT FROM CONVERSATIONS
Far-right groups are experts at manipulation. You may be shocked to find your loved one now holds beliefs that you find horrific and just not true.
Avoid telling them they are wrong or dismissing their views as extremist propaganda – after all, who likes to be told what they should and shouldn’t believe?
MY LOVED ONE WON’T TALK TO ME
Sometimes with the best will in the world it’s hard to even get a conversation started. If you are in this situation, please get in touch. We can suggest ice breakers to encourage your loved ones to open up and have conversations to find out why people are angry and why they think being involved in extremism, will help things become better.
WHEN CONVERSATIONS DON’T GO TO PLAN
Being honest this is real life and sometimes your conversations won’t always go the way you want.
If arguments start, the smart move is to take a break. Suggest making a cup of tea or walking the dog – or tell them you have a chore you must do, like going to the shops. This will give you the space you both need.
Once the heat is out of the conversation, ask if you can continue another time. This will leave the door open to talk again and this is very important.
Above all, try not to feel disheartened. It’s a long road, but helping your child is possible and we are here to help you using our lived experience.
INSIDE STORIES
Wanting to highlight real Inside Stories, we have created a number of films which show how we have supported families to help loved ones leave the far-right and rebuild their lives. Their stories have been adapted and told by actors to protect the identity of the people we work with.
If you would like to share your story with us, please get in contact with our team, because the more people who know what life is like having a loved one involved, the more people will reach out for support. This can be via a blog article or podcast, so your identity is protected. Interested? Email: info@exithate.org
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GAVIN’S STORY Gavin was alarmed to find his son posting fascist videos online. But when he challenged him about it, his son wouldn’t listen. With expert guidance from Exit Family Support, Gavin tried a different approach. Slowly, he helped his son turn away from extremism, enrol at college and get his future back. |
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EMMA'S STORY Emma never had any trouble with her two kids when they were growing up until her son Pete became interested in the far-right. This film tells the story of her ordeal from finding out about Pete’s involvement, through to making contact with us and how we were able to help her get her son back. |
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KARL'S STORY Sometimes it’s hard to know what’s going on inside a loved one’s head. This film follows Karl’s journey with the far-right. It looks at the hurt it caused him, and those around him, and how with support from friends, family and Exit Hate he was able to leave and rebuild his life. |
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REAL HELP FROM PEOPLE WHO’VE BEEN THERE
Understanding how alone people can feel when a loved one is part of a far-right organisation, we want to help and support families, every step of the way.
Working across the UK we support families to help their children leave extremism behind and rebuild their lives through our dedicated support programme which includes 121 support and an online family support group.
ONE-TO-ONE MENTORING
Offering expert guidance from a designated mentor we offer help for as long as you need it.
We provide practical and emotional support to suit your needs including how to have difficult conversations and challenge extremist beliefs.
Promoting general safeguarding we can offer advice and support including help from a dedicated mentor in a series of 121 mentoring sessions, where we create a wellbeing plan that will support your family and your loved one who is involved.
Offering expert guidance from a designated mentor we offer help for as long as you need it.
We provide practical and emotional support to suit your needs including how to have difficult conversations and challenge extremist beliefs.
Promoting general safeguarding we can offer advice and support including help from a dedicated mentor in a series of 121 mentoring sessions, where we create a wellbeing plan that will support your family and your loved one who is involved.
ADDITIONAL SUPPORT
Following our mentoring support, all families are offered the opportunity to join our invite only online family support group, where families support and empower each other.
If this is something you are interested in, please speak to your mentor who will arrange this.
Where needed we will seek to connect you to supplementary organisations that can help with any additional needs identified
Following our mentoring support, all families are offered the opportunity to join our invite only online family support group, where families support and empower each other.
If this is something you are interested in, please speak to your mentor who will arrange this.
Where needed we will seek to connect you to supplementary organisations that can help with any additional needs identified
YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED
We often get asked the same questions about who we are and how we work so here are some quick answers to get you started. If you want to know more, please email us at: info@exithate.org and we’ll get back to you as soon as we can.
Can I trust you?
Yes, you can. People involved in Exit Family Support are people who understand, we have gone through this ourselves either because we have had a loved one involved ourselves, are a former member or are people who work daily to support people to walk away from extremism.
How can you help?
Firstly we don’t judge and know that people involved in the far-right suffer too. We listen and provide you with ways to engage that don't turn into rows.
We believe supported families, honest conversations and education are critical to getting people to turn away from extremism and we know this works having helped hundreds of people walk away from extremism.
Are the conversations confidential?
Yes, they are. However we do have a duty of care so if anyone tells us about planning or committing an act of violence that will cause harm to themselves or others, we must report this to protect the individual concerned and others. Against ALL extremism and violence, we seek to break the cycle of hate and violence to create safer communities for us all.
Can you help people involved?
Yes, we can. We have formers (former members of the far-right) who have been through this themselves and left. We can get formers who have been there and done it, to talk to people currently involved and they can have honest conversations about extremism, that only people who have been involved can have and and they highlight how life is now so much better now they have left. Understanding how the far-right operate, they know what it is like to believe and to leave. They can show people involved what life is like after people leave and how people can rebuild their lives and start again. To find out more please get in touch for more information
Do you operate nationwide?
Yes, we do. We provide support over the phone, online and where we can in-person if needed. Each case is different, so we adapt to what is best for you, depending on our capabilities at the time.
Ok, I want you to help me. What’s the next step?
We’ll need to chat. The process is different for everyone. We will need to know what help you want and also some information about the individual involved, so we can help them too. To get in touch, please email or call us, see details below.
